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Wednesday, September 10, 2008

REAL TOUR

Hi, we just got back from the latest F Yeah Tour. It was a real trip - let me tell you about it:

We got to LA after flying straight there from London. 4 FUs spend most of their time off making posters and eating burritos, while me and Falco went to NYC and saw a Yankees Game


We forgot how to take the skytrain from JFK and ended up getting on a bus that took us as far as New Lots in Brooklyn in about an hour. We were bummed.   Also, our flight was not bumped up to first class, like it had been on the way to London in July, so we had to ride in the normal part of the airplane, like idiots.  Anyhow, we got to LA about 4 hours before we were supposed to play, and spend most of that doing a photoshoot for Spin, and eating burritos.
While the rest of the band watched Matt and Kim, I was just waiting to catch the Glass Candy set, who are my favorite band (after Vampire Weekend).  You can see how bored I was during our set:



No Age was sick - check out the gear:



That night we went back to Seans friends house for about 4 hours of shut eye.  Later that morning, a huge bus arrived out front and 15 hippies fell out of it.  While bags and small amps got loaded into the trailer, FU played soccer in the street.

If you have travelled, or are from the West Coast, you'll know that the drive between LA and the Bay Area is a mammoth journey, so we gave ourselves about 12 hours to do it.  We pulled out of LA at around 9am, and got to the Gilman with enough time for the promotor to almost cancel the show because we were so late.  On the way there we stopped for vegetable oil like 10 times, and took the hills at about 20mph.  None of the grease was high enough quality, so I think we loaded it with diesel.  Ironically, I bought deep fried macaroni and cheese at a Carl's Jr (the grease there wasn't good enough to use).  When we got to the show Strange Boys had to go on almost immediately.  I guess we cut into TRASH TALK's set because we were so late, so we let them bust some jams during our set.  That was cool, but I guess someone called them Muslims or said Muslims are gay as a heckle, so they beat the shit out of the dude outside after the show. We haven't played a show at the Gilman so far that hasn't ended in a fight after the show.

We stayed with Scotty in the Bay that night and I'm pretty sure some people were smoking dope upstairs. I was asleep in the garage, as usual.  

The next day we got up at 8am to go running. Just kidding, we got up at noon and they smoked more weed and then we took the BART into SF for that nights show at the Hemlock.  Although I'm pretty sure I did wake up at 8 - I've been jet lagged for 2 weeks.  So we spent most of the train ride sticking our fingers in Jonahs ears while he was trying to talk to Jessica:

The Show in SF was kind of a bummer - we are trying to play through Fender Twins that have no reverb and both my guitars are broken. Plus we are so "over it" at this point it's not even funny. I'm pretty sure I played most of my leads from inside the bathroom backstage while I'm puking from self-loathing.   Lots of moshing though. Afterwards we hang out with modern punk luminarios from SEX VID and WARKRIME (with a K).  Sidenote - last time we played the Hemlock Josh got so sick from smoking crack that he threw up in his own bag of leftover sushi.

That night we go back to Scotty's house to mental prepare ourselves for the 56 hour journey to Seattle we are about to embark on.  Things start to get REALLY hairy the next morning:

Our bros pick us up sometime in the morning - we are all feeling very chill because a) they are all on dope and b) we have 2.5 days to complete what would normally be a 16 hour car ride.  At 11am, we hit the road. We first go to that famous sandwich place in Oakland.  Then we need to find some veggie oil.  We go to this boating place to find a filter. Then we have to go to the same store, across town.  Then we stop at this Chinese restaurant downtown and FU plays soccer on the street for about 2 hours.  Then we get on the freeway and OOPS we left the trailer open so everyone's luggage ends up on the 5.  A lot of it gets pummeled by the traffic, while the rest of it lands real close to a dead dog. We all think it is "gross" but we grab it anyhow.  At about 5pm, we are finally on the highway out of the Bay.  We start looking for a hotel in WEED (the K hole of Cali), and finally find one in Mt Shasta.  We relax after a grueling 14 hour drive (or something). The next morning we get back on the road in search of more veggie oil.  

Somehow the grease we put in the van on the first day has been fucking with our bus - we are continually having problems.  The bus goes up hill at like 5mph and at one point the bus stops working on an incline. I still have no idea how we made it up.  We find out later that the tank is full of ALGEA because grease was left inside it all summer. Try telling that to your mechanic.  Anyhow, we figure we'll have no problem making it to Portland in enough time to do some live sets on KBOO before our friends show is over at 1am. Guess what - we got there after 1am!  All of our Portland bros where there tho, and they brought us like 50 donuts.  We spend the night at Mikeys House and leisurely drive to Seattle for the next show.   We stop at this wierd hippie commune to try and buy bio diesel. I have no idea if that worked because I was playing soccer. A few hours later we find ourselves at ANOTHER place so that we can TRADE our grease for someone elses higher quality grease. What a world right? I know. Meanwhile, I'm playing more soccer than I ever have in my life - I spend like 2 hours in a field with my pants off doing reps and drills with FU while the other bands are at a Bowling Alley bowling or smoking reefer or something.  Anyhow, some sort of fuel eventually gets put into our some sort of bus, and we're off.

We get to Olympia super late to play with Sex Vid. We did a lot of hanging out with them.  Here is what it looked like:

Meanwhile Olympia is one of the weirdest towns in the country. The next day we hang out at the lesbian burrito place RJ takes us to, and we're seeing dudes with high shorts go cycling by and like 15 people walk by with no shoes.  Did I mention that the club had almost no lights on inside? Think about it.  The vibe definetly has affected Josh, who plays the entire set with sunglasses off, and is pulling guitar moves like he's in the California Raisins.  It blows both mine and Damian's mind(s), and we play most of our set almost throwing up in disbelief.  We all sleep at Judds that night - me in the laundry room.  Meanwhile Timmy is flipping out 24 hours a day:


I spend the next few days in the Sex Vid van because none of those dudes have licenses or cell phones.  Plus their van is powered by steam, and none of them can stop flipping out while its moving.  We're on the way to Seattle.

We get to the Vera Project I think in enough time, I think, but we bail on soundcheck because we are playing soccer in the alleyway.  After the show we get food at Dicks, where a burger is like $1.50 and a sundae is $1.75.  Keep in mind its like 2am at this point.  Jonah is tired because he's been talking to a journalist from Japan through an interpreter and his phone is running out of power every 10 minutes (good thing we aren't using it to drive).

Where was I.  Oh yeah at some point the next day I get booted from my seat because this intense power thing got put there that said "beware" and "high voltage danger" all over it:
Also on the last drive I forgot to mention that we stopped for an extended period of time on a highway underpass to: 1) smoke weed; 2) look at cows (see #1); 3) probably do some shit with the bus that I wasn't paying attention to; 4) play soccer.

After Seattle We play Portland for that Music Fest. It's pretty sick.  I'm playing out of a Marshall stack at this show for the first time this tour, and all set I'm watching Sean Carlson barf and convulse because it's so loud and intense.  That night we had hotels and about 75 people came up to the Red Lion to jam in our rooms. I immediately go into the chill room to play rummy with some people but it gets invaded almost immediately after that with drug users and strangers. I feel like I'm trapped inside a Philip K Dick book for like the next 10 hours. 

At this point Sandy has turned into an actual living Anime character and is turning real objects into words and concepts in real time:

Magic Word anyone?:


Put a bug into my ear

When i woke up I was here

I blew smoke onto a page

And watched the letters re-arrange


Pushed the words into my veins

Tripped the valve inside my brain

Spoke a language I could see

I swam inside reality


Write in vines and speak in tongues

Double meanings in my lungs

Brazen head spits out the skies

These words are heavy but i'm alright, alright


The tangled web inside my head

Changed the canvas as it spread  

Concepts mushroomed as I talked

Notions opened as I walked


Chemistry is just a word

We use to describe what occurs

when subtle changes in your mind

make energy from common lives


Write in vines and speak in tongues

Double meanings in my lungs

Brazen head spits out the skies

These words are heavy but i'm alright


Things move everywhere i look

I'm stuck in someone else's book

Letter perfect engineer

Then it all just disappears alright


Write in vines and speak in tongues

Double meanings in my lungs

Brazen head spits out the skies

These words are heaven but i'm alright


All of my words became one

All the changes were undone

I'm a strange loop that is clear

Put a bug into my ear



Meanwhile at this point I am so deranged that I'm breaking windows with my mind Event-Horizon style:


There is so much weed smoke and duct tape inside the van that I start to materialize my own hatred towards it in these physical manifestations. The rest of the van decides for my own good I have to wear a straight jacket for the rest of the tour.

I catch an hour of Zs at some point and then we drive to Vancouver.  Oh shit - we got there late! We run out of GAS (the real kind) 5 miles away from the club and the drivers spend like an hour skateboarding around south Vancouver trying to find diesel. These dudes are legit hard dudes and manage to cop some so we can get to the show. Check out this picture of 5 people loading gas into the tank and Jonah having a weed attack:



We miss White Lung, and play rushed sets. At this point all I can think about is 1) Blogging and; 2) Vampire Weekend so I can't remember what happened that night other than Damian fell off the stage from atop a speaker wedge, and Nardwuar interviewed us on the bus for like 15 hours, and we ate a fine meal at 4am at some restarant. Also by this time I forgot to mention that the Strange Boys bailed because they can't get into Canada, but are sending smoke signals (from weed) from Portland to tell us how they are partying.

We get to the airport at 6am and jump on the 7am flight. For the first time in my life I fall asleep in a plane without the use of sleeping pills (I dropped and lost those on the plane while I was sleeping - not shit). Get home and sleep for 16 hours. Wake up, immediately blog while listening to Vampire Weekend.
In all seriousness, everyone who helped on this tour made life intensely bearable while we drove the most unsafe and intense vehicles I've ever been on up one of the most treacherous coast drives in America. Many thanks to:
Sean and Phil
Johnny and Garrett
Crystal Antlers, Strange Boys
Timmy H
Michael and Videothing
Mikey, Yannick and everyone else in Portland
Sex vid the band and the concept
Scotty and Cassie
Kevin Shields for singing on our new record.

58 Comments:

Anonymous Pig Knuckles said...

Wait a sec...you guys have light show now? far fucking out, maaaan. Not since The Soup Dragons has a band brought punk back to the dance floor like F'ed Up.

10:34 AM  
Anonymous Chris said...

Vancouver show:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UnBnAIZBr1M

There's other video from the vancouver show on there as well. No videos of pink eyes falling though. Or the "man-gina"

10:44 PM  
Anonymous Pesci said...

I rode in that van from Sneaky Dee's to my house at King and Bathurst and I thought I was going to DIE.

11:19 PM  
Anonymous Toni Francois said...

hey!! I uploaded pictures from the Vancouver show here:
http://www.tono.tv/wordpress/?p=557

1:36 AM  
Anonymous your ex-boss said...

the secret word(s) is/are light(s). do i win?

11:17 PM  
Blogger John said...

I can't believe you just namedropped Event Horizon.

12:57 AM  
Anonymous rachel said...

Just sitting on that bus for a min outside my house before yous left was enough for me.

6:19 PM  
Anonymous paulyhardcore said...

re: Chris' post -

that's my vid - i posted others - all I took - Baiting the Public - Police _ Colour Removal - Days of Last - crusades - david comes to life - & YES I posted the clip of Pink Eyes Falling.

i took a few photos - but because of the shorttened set - stuck to video.

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=71051&l=ad3d0&id=607495489

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